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very, obvious that I was ultra-diffident as far as the girls were concerned, in fact, as far as almost anything was concerned, for despite my many girl interests over the years up to that time, I was still bashful with them most of the time and they were the ones who had to make the advances for the most part.

As I have said, I was disturbed on and off by the lack of a fraternity but I think that perhaps it was having Louie Neale come to the campus and go Alphi Phi which put the final spur into me. Incidentally, I can't remember ever going to an Alpha Phi dance with Louie although, if I didn't, it seems strange I'd have continued to date her because I had considerable personal pride. At any rate, I became very bitter about my rejection by the Phi Delts, not only my father's fraternity but also his own chapter. I was doing well in school, I had lots of friends, certainly I'd not be a disgrace to them. My father had had a Phi brother in town named Dr. Lewis and Mother knew Dr. Lewis quite well from the old days. One day I came home from school in a particularly bitter frame of mind over the situation and sounded off pretty violently to Mother about it. I was violent enough to decide her on contacting Dr. Lewis about the thing and asking him if he wouldn't intercede for me with the local brothers, with whom I think Dr. Lewis had good relations. So Dr. Lewis did this and in due time, I had an invitation to visit the house again, and this time they gave me a bid, which I accepted and was duly initiated along in the fall of 1922. Incidentally, they really beat me to a fare-thee-well during the initiation and I thought I knew why and I gritted my teeth and took it. I never talked to Dr. Lewis personally about the affair and, in fact, I didn't know him, even by sight; but he evidently laid the law down to the chapter and thus I got in. I know now that it wasn't worth it and it was a mistake, and I'm really ashamed of having forced myself in as I did. The result of this was that I never felt fully at home at the chapter house and I made very few good friends among the brothers. I tried to spend time at the house and get closer to the boys, I went there to meals two or three times a week and attended all the dances and meetings -- but I was diffident and reticent anyhow and particularly so with strangers and the attitude toward me at the house wasn't ideal for overcoming my difficulties. Moreover, there was a lot of drinking, particularly at parties and I wasn't yet a drinker, so I couldn't yet use this barrier-breaker to help my cause. I know now that I placed far too much importance on belonging to a fraternity and I can't help thinking that my Phi Delt brother, Ralph Cordiner, the president of General Electric, couldn't have cared less about such an affiliation -- what he was interested in was your capabilities and what kind of a job you did and he'd have been insulted if anybody had tried to impress him with being a brother in the bond. It was a big mistake but there it was.