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Page 8
Monday, January 28, 1946


The one who thinks our jokes are poor,
Would straightaway change his views,
Could he compare the jokes we print
With those we couldn't use.


Definition of marriage: An institution which teaches a man patience, thrift, morality and many other splendid virtues he wouldn't need if he'd stayed single.


The guys were discussing the point system of demobilization and things were pretty noisy when the sergent yelled ... "At ease, I want it so quiet in here that we can hear a point drop."


If you take somebody's life ... it's a sin,
If you take somebody's wife ... It's a sin,
If you drink or smoke or chew,
If you take what's not your due,
The with HEAVEN you are thru ... it's a sin.
If you play around with dice ... it's a sin,
If you indulge in a bottle of vice ... it's a sin,
And if Army life seems dry,
And you feel you'd rather die,
Suicide you cannot try ... it's a sin.

[[black and white photo of woman]]
CHASSIS. As a reward for her excellent work as the lovely heroine in "First Yank Into Tokyo," Barbara Hale will be co-starred with Robert Young and Frank Morgan in RKO Radio's "Lady Luck," the story of a gambler.

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4. Length of game: Limited to one hour. If game exceeds one hour, team ahead shall be declared the winner.

5. Any team appearing more than fifteen (15) minutes late for contest automatically forfeits game to waiting opponent.

6. Men playing on Base Team are restricted from League games.

7. Protests of games may be submitted in writing to League Council for final decisions before noon of following day after end of contest.

8. The League Council consists of one properly elected representative from each team. They will form all final decisions regarding League.



Washington (CNS)--The average GI wil ltake a 25% pay cut upon discharge, Rep Hook (D-Mich), has figured out. The way he sees it, the average GI is an EM with two kids, serving overseas, and his weekly income is $47.51. Average civilian earnings during peace (without bonuses and overtime) will be $33.96 in manufacturing, says Hook.

[[comic sketch]]
"Tomorrow he's mister."

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had reasons, we heard ... (Everyone is hereby cordially invited to attend my funeral.)


June Gay, on KP, yelling "Hurry up folks! Finish your supper ... Free beer in the day room in ten minutes!" They tell me she had the mess hall cleared of tea sippers in record time.


That gathering place, fostered by such geniuses as the "Smiling Smitty", "Clowning Cawthon", "Happy Hall", the "Sad Sack" and "Most Noble Brown"--in other words, the Hobby Shop, is being moved. You'll find these guys in the building directly opposite the Officer's Club ... Oh yes, there is an Officer's Club on the field. You didn't know? Why yes! That's what that tiny edifice is ... Hadn't you noticed the venitian blinds?


Gee, Ma'am, it's awfully cold, and there's no place to go with there sometimes being only one movie on Tuesdays and Wednesdays ... Do we just HAVE to have those Bingo parties and Hen sessions in the day room, excluding all our male friends? Gosh, aren't things just about dull enough around here as it is?


How do the people, who have all the cabs occupied in bad weather get them in the first place, since no one can get a cab because they are all occupied?

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hasn't it follows and we want you to know that if we are ever down this way in 1949 we will drop in and have chow with you.

If anyone has the words to Sinatra's song, "Nancy With The Laughing Face", please get in touch with King Berry or Ellis Richardson as soon as possible.

Nomination of the year for the champion stove shaker goes to S/Sgt George F Smith, Jr, with the compliments of the selection chairman, Sgt Joe Jefferson. Congrats Smitty.

With these few words we will take our leave of thee for another seven days. Bye now and thanks for reading this far.
Please note that the language and terminology used in this collection reflects the context and culture of the time of its creation, and may include culturally sensitive information. As an historical document, its contents may be at odds with contemporary views and terminology. The information within this collection does not reflect the views of the Smithsonian Institution, but is available in its original form to facilitate research. For questions or comments regarding sensitive content, access, and use related to this collection, please contact