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in the first two weeks of performance. So a turkey is unlikely to have a cast album, but a schelp along will. "1600" could have been recorded, but wasn't--by choice of the composers. Albums of the score from Anyone Can Whistle, one of Sondheim's early efforts, are today considered collector's items.

There is some amount of cachet in having seen a good flop. You never know when one of the principals will become so famous that you will be glad to have said you saw his flop or bought the album; it's very good cocktail party chatter. If, however, you resent having spent your precious dollars on a semiprecious evening in the theatre, check out a list of Ten Top Turkeys, shrug your shoulders and realize that there but for the grace of God go we.

TEN TOP TURKEYS 
(Alphabetical order)
Anyone Can Whistle – "Ahead of its time!" said Stephen Sondheim. "Lousy book" said the pros. Very chic to mention that you saw one of the performances. But then, according to one theatre source, if everyone who claims to have seen Anyone Can Whistle actually saw it, it would still be running today.

Breakfast at Tiffany's/Holly Golightly – "This was my Bay of Pigs" remarked Producer Merrick at the time. Title change made on the road. Mary Tyler Moore and Richard Chamberlain. After the movie.

Darling of the Day – Okay, okay, we never heard of it either, but it made the papers February 26, 1968 as the biggest loser in Broadway history. Thirty-two performances. $700,000.

Dude – Brainchild of the Hair team. They filled the stage with 160 bags of real dirt. $800,000. 1972.

Home Sweet Homer – What can you say about Yul Brynner in a wig? Losses hard to estimate because the play was financed by the Kennedy Center and did meet expenses on its lengthy odyssey before its one night stand in New York. Educated guess: over $800,000.

Kelly – Considered the worst flop of the theatre until "1600". It was about a man who jumps off the Brooklyn Bridge and survives, which was more than the play did. One night and $650,000.

Mata Hari – Broadway's biggest two-time loser. Merrick's original production, Mata Hari, ran for a month in Washington, then died there. Resurrected the next season, under the title Before the Firing Squad, it died Off Broadway. 1967-68.

Pleasure and Palaces – Never even made it to Broadway. Died in Detroit. R.I.P. Frank Loesser score. Bob Fosse choreography. 1968.

1600 Pennsylvania Avenue – You've only seen "1600" once! $1.2 million.

Via Galactica – Something about a space ship landing on another planet. Featured a giant trampoline set into the stage so the actors could jump around simulating weightlessness while delivering their equally weightless lines. $1,000,000. 1972.
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EDITOR'S NOTE – "Darling You Were Wonderful" by Harvey Sabinson is being published next spring and details the lives and deaths of many a flop.

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© 1975 Commonwealth of Puerto Rico

In tonight's martini the part of gin and vodka will be played by white rum.
[[Image – photo of a chilled rocks glass full of ice and clear liquid; there is what looks to be an olive in it]]
White rum from Puerto Rico will finally play the role its distinctive clarity and smoothness have so well prepared it for.

In fact, white rum has already proven itself in rehearsal. It beat gin and vodka on taste and smoothness in a nationwide test. That's because all white rum from Puerto Rico is aged for at least a year – by law.

White rum is ready to take a leading role in the martini.

Like any new star, all it needs is a chance.

PUERTO RICAN RUMS [[image – logo of Puerto Rican rums: a stylized campanile as if seen through an arched window]]

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Transcription Notes:
My understanding is that we don't correct spelling, punctuation, etc., but rather transcribe exactly what's there. So "Maitre" is spelled without the accent circonflexe--no need to add it. But I didn't take it out of the last transcription; not worth sending the whole page through another review just for that.

Please note that the language and terminology used in this collection reflects the context and culture of the time of its creation, and may include culturally sensitive information. As an historical document, its contents may be at odds with contemporary views and terminology. The information within this collection does not reflect the views of the Smithsonian Institution, but is available in its original form to facilitate research. For questions or comments regarding sensitive content, access, and use related to this collection, please contact transcribe@si.edu.