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with him, & he is worth any amount of trouble. He is so fine & understanding, & so troubled now - & so remarkable always - that any smallness on my part seems disgusting. In spite of all his troubles he is human & sensitive as ever - & the only person I could ever marry. I used to think that if he could do as well for me as he could for his family (even become independent from them) all would be well - & he has not lost the [[strikethrough]] other [[/strikethrough]] first, but gained the last. I have been lonely & friendless - & had to be serious - but the times call for that, & he is worth it!