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2-4-46 6:30 am Of George Barker (- how easily said)- "Hide in the heart again There is no help without." But tonight, as on many many nights, the sanctuary of the heart is to lonely, and I am sick of loneliness. Oh yes, there have been times when loneliness was my greatest & most cherished possession. But now, with the world of adult responsibility & concern all alive around me, I know it is not enough to stand alone in shining loneliness. I have a noisy, happy party at my studio 2 night ago, and as soon as the last guest left, where was I? What advance had I made in my search for a meaningful state of relations with my friends? I attend the movies at the MMA: Land Without Bread, Easter Island, Ceylon. The struggle for existence, the dreadful meaninglessness, the barreness of life.