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The newly-weds they exercised both night and day
At Nacoochee they did it in the scientific way
And when night time came they would need no torch
And they'd relieve their minds on the wonderful porch.

They spent one month and the work did them good
Then they'd exercise weakly as a new couple should
In the sunny south where real loafin is fine
So the goin was slower on the Heye line.

At the end of the month they looked so thin
That when people saw them they were sure to grin
So they hired a special and hiked out alone
To get to the main line where they were not known.

When they reached New York George G. was brave as a lord
Harmon gave one look and said My Gawd My Gawd!
He hardly knew them now that they were a pair
And he thought they'd soon be looking for a mountain Heir.

But the years rolled on and though they did their best
When night time came they simply had to rest
And though they surely are a peachy pair
They still are longing for that mountain heir.

The third anniversary has rolled around
And a happier couple could not be found
They were put through right on the day that they wed
But [[strikethrough]] its [[strikethrough]] this is a damn lonesome eighth for Pep and Fred.

But they're with you tonight both heart and soul
And no matter how fast the years may roll
There are two real friends who are staunch and true 
And they're sending their greetings from old Hawikuh.