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Let's see if I can pull this together. All of us (including staff) [[crossed out]] has so [[crossed out]] have so many associations with authority, ability, expertise etc. that it makes it difficult to analyze our interaction. In the past I have often gotten the message that it is only students who have authority hang-ups. I find that impossible.to believe and yet we have never looked at the baggage we carry as a group. For staff to facilitate each meeting and choose topics for discussion and use the position as facili[[crossed out]]aa[[crossed out]]tor to take a greater share of time and space to present perceptions intimates that staff have something to teach us about community. I happen to think that the community that I have been referring to as [[crossed out]]st[[crossed out]] "staff" is not a model [[crossed out]]fo[[crossed out]] to base the entire FSW on. More directly:from all appearance and information passed around through the various direct and indirect routes that it travels in the building, "staff" has a hell of a time communicating at all. Which brings me to Let's not fight in Front of the Kids. As "focalizers" or whatever you want to call it for the FSW and the visible position you choose to take in community gather[[crossed out]]s[[crossed out]]ings makes your relationship a model - always unspoken- for the entire community. You are the basis and because of the strength of your personalities, your visibility [[crossed out]]and[[crossed out]] the energy you create with each other has to effect the entire group. Let me see, this is beginning to sound like "Whatever it is, its all your fault". Hmmmm. Time for self-criticism and a suggestion. I've never asked (up to now) or verbalized that I felt it is an issue that affects the entire FSW (DOn't ask me, I just sit here). It seemed none of my business (It's hopeless, I can't, why try). I believe it needs to be broached, it not for community approval, at least to make conscious the way it affects our interactions with each other.

"Who's Going to Babysit Tonight". This is perhaps the most infuriating of all for me. When Suzanne stated that most staff was in a state of overextension because of the necessity to [[strikethrough]] work elsewhere seemed common [[/strikethrough]] MOST of us work elsewhere and [[strikethrough]] for those of us [[/strikethrough]] some put[[strikethrough]] ting [[/strikethrough]] in forty hours a week otuside of the FSW [[strikethrough]] that [[/strikethrough]] it seems sane to me that your involvement be restricted. However, that you find it necessary to rotate community meeting duty is insulting. If you can't come, don't come. My feeling is that if you didn't delegate it out, none of you would come, and we would be put in the position of calling YOU to see what is wrong. Perhaps what is happening will challenge some of the old patterns of relating. MY self-criticism up to know is that I have not challenged this [[strikethrough]] and that [[/strikethrough]] before (It's hopeless, why try).

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work elsewhere I felt sympathy
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