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Oh darling- I wish so terribly that you were here. I need you badly because I have been crying most of the day about us. I long so much to marry you tomorrow or never see you again. I know you can't understand that, but I am just so torn between thinking the worst & thinking the best about our being together! My sick cook came into the room today & caught me crying. 

She asked what was the matter, & when I said we are engaged & I'm crying about the troubles we've had. She said "but this should be the happiest time in your life." I also know that any changing in people [[strikethrough]] must [[/strikethrough]] is more apt to happen before they're married, & [[strikethrough]] I was told that any changing a man does [[/strikethrough]] that the man is not apt to later.

I have also decided that tolerance & understanding & both sides is the only way to get along. Jealousy is a sign that one or the other is afraid