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5Relationships 22.

calm. I said this to Reginald. I said, "So, whatever you do, until this is over for me, don't write me you've become engaged."

"Oh, I wouldn't think of marrying her or anything like that."

I was visiting a girlfriend and I said, "Saturday I'm going to get a letter and if I cry, pay no attention. I'm going through something."

Saturday I got a letter, that he was engaged [[strikethrough]] "Am marrying Tuesday."[[/strikethrough]] Tuesday was the day going to the meeting [[strikethrough]] receiving this man Saturday I got the letter that he was engaged. No date of marriage [[/strikethrough]], and I said, "My god, I bet he'll marry Tuesday. [[strikethrough]] it'll come Tuesday [[/strikethrough]]."

Tuesday got the [[strikethrough]] a [[/strikethrough]] telegram [[strikethrough]] and [[/strikethrough]] he married a half an hour away from when I was having this meeting that was very important to me. 

Twice in my life I've done things that I think are difficult to do, [[strikethrough]] with Reginald [[/strikethrough]]. I loved Reginald [[strikethrough]] him [[/strikethrough]], very very much. We were very close. I let myself sink into all the sorrow that I could wish, touching the depths of sorrow and then closing the door. When I came up the next day, I was a different person. It's hard to put into words.

Also, with this man I fell in love with in India, I fell very much in love with him. I realized one day, it was impossible, that we could never really be together, that I had to give up. And again, it was a terrible terrible grief. I did, in a different way, the same thing. I said, "No question of my