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[1971] MALVINA REYNOLDS 2027 Parker Street Berkeley, California 94704 Dear good friends: Bud had a stroke at the beginning of July. As they say, we all have our troubles. But I am going to tell you about this in some detail, and I hope before I am through, that you will understand why. A part of his brain was injured by a broken blood vessel, as I understand it. His signs to the right was immediately destroyed, and the section of his brain that deals with speech and memory was clouded. Physically he was spared —- he can walk, use both hands very well, and his appearance and general health are good. But as he himself observes, his history begins now at only a few months ago, and, sociable as he is, his conversation is limites —- though there is good evidence that much more thinking is going on than he can convey, and more understanding that he can seem to respond to. His improvement is continuous, and he amazes us with sudden insights, flashes of humor, and ability to make himself understood in rather complicated matters. But many of our good friends do not know how to cope with this situation and we find ourselves isolated at times because people are shy of this strange phenomenon. Other cultures have traditional, social, ritual ways of coping with illness, as they have with death. Our ways tens to be formal, limited, though the natural kindness of many does help. Our “civilization” is so youth- success- “joy-“ oriented that it refuses to deal with other universal manifestations of life. The poor, the old, the sick, te maimed, instead of being helped when they most need it, are stigmatized for their heavy burdens. I admit that I myself have only become sharply aware of this situation since it has hit home. Bud and I are earning our wisdom, paying our dues. In a true community, no member bears his sorrows alone. It is borne to some extent by all, and so become light enough for each one to bear tolerably. When the actress Pat Neale was stricken, her husband, a man of resources and authority, simply mobilizes all of their Telephone: (415) 843-2365
