Viewing page 43 of 143

This transcription has been completed. Contact us with corrections.

-38-

Immediate action was required of me. Going up to St. Amar I drew down one of his hands and shook it. Limply, in return, he shook mine. I was then relieved to find that he not only recognized me but seemed pleased at my return. From that moment the sympathy I felt for him gave my mother ample excuse for loading me with responsibilities almost too heavy to bear.

On looking back at this time, I see my mother as a crazy ring-master directing her own small and private circus. In her opinion, evidently, life in this world was beyond contempt, but there being no immediate escape either for herself or her son, it was expedient that everyone else should be put through their paces as uncomfortably as possible. Her place was in the centre of the ring madly cracking a whip and bringing despotic energy to quicken the strides. Even my brother was not quite spared for he was forced to travel continually "for his health", although there was no doubt that the overwrought nerves demanded relief in peace and quiet.