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Unknown
Mary McBride
01/AUG/1967
SKIT IN WHICH HUSBAND IS MAD BECAUSE WIFE IS ALWAYS ON PHONE:
FANG: Can't you ever be off the telephone when I get home?
PHYLLIS: I've got to go, Mable, Fang's home. (Hangs up) I work all day, and that's the thanks I get. I'm the best housekeeper in the neighborhood.
FANG: What makes you think you're a good housekeeper -- just 'cuz there isn't any dust on the telephone?
PHYLLIS: I never get to talk. Did you notice this morning the minute I got on the phone the kids wanted something?
FANG: Yeah, breakfast!  It was 7:00.  I couldn't even through at noon, and you know how I like to call you at noon. It's easier to take half a day's complaints at a time.
PHYLLIS: I don't talk on the phone much.
FANG: You don't talk on the phone much?! What other woman has offers from sponsors?!!
If there were a parking meter in front of that phone, we could have paid off the mortgage.
PHYLLIS: How could I get this tan if I were always on the phone?
FANG: It's probably from the light on your Princess phone. I called home 10 times today and the line was busy.
PHYLLIS: I was ordering groceries.
FANG: What do you do? Run a super market?
PHYLLIS: And I had 50 calls to make for the PTA.
FANG: What's that? The Public Telephoning Association?
PHYLLIS: I wish we didn't even have a phone.
FANG: O Yeah, how come you start every conversation with, "What Hath God Wroght?"  
Just one day I'd like to have a busy wife instead of a busy line. I hate to see kids running around the house at 11:00, still in their pajamas.
PHYLLIS: They haven't done that for moths, since...since.
FANG: Oh, yeah, since you let 'em sleep in their clothes. I'll bet you don't even know how many kids we got.
PHYLLIS: Well, when I used to count them, it just made me nervous.
FANG: You wouldn't even know it was raining outside unless the phone leaked.

Transcription Notes:
Kept spelling "Wroght". Kept spelling "moths".