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I now feel confident of my own ability to do all I told Mr. Wade and Wilder I could - and that the more certainly because I have really grown a good deal older during my month of hard unremitting and watchful mental exertion here.

I somehow dont feel as much like a boy as I did, and I notice that I can control men. - 
I am still my own self enough to be egotistical you see - and I take
pleasure in assuring you that