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[[underlined]]Sunday January 19th 1896.[[/underlined]]
Merit is sometimes rewarded. I was so penitent in Church to-day. Jim was there (I suppose I shouldn't have seen it but did) and I feel terribly deeply. We were going to stay for communion so when the people started to go out I took a last look at the back of his head, saw out of the corner of my eye how he turned to open the pew door, and then glued my eyes on

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my prayer book. I knew I had never seen him stay. I did not look up till everyone had left & then - there he was. The only one remaining in his pew. I feel so deeply and solemnly that it was more than an ordinary pleasure for me to go through the holy service with him. I knew he felt very near God too and it seemed to make us nearer each other. I don't think it was wicked to think that way about it. I always