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[[image - cartoon of 4 G.I.s, one talking on phone, one sitting at radio control board. Captioned: "So help me, colonel! It's Lana Turner at 270-20 - and closing!"]]

[[image - cartoon of two soldiers, one holding package that reads 'Do Not Open Till Christmas'. Captioned: "Go ahead and open it - they might have meant last Christmas." Cartoonist credit: Chris Kenyon [{?]]] 570 [[?]] ]]