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And the way I am going on now may have something to do with war or change in  my life. But as I grow older I see things in more severe ways of life xxxxxxxxx than I used to think. I used to think life was glorious and always sunny.

It isn't that I enjoy beginning to feel that way about it but somehow the things I remember in the past are not joy or happiness but things I suffered which I remember far better, and today I am more confronted with that kind of tendency, not because I'm inviting it but promblems seem to pile up one thing on top of another and perhaps my life may be built on that basis. So that I have to accept it and make use of it to my advantage as well as I can.

Years ago people called me a cynic but I didn't really know what that meant or really didn't think I was then, but today I think I am indeed more inclined towards that direction. I think what I'm doing today, if I can generalize, is a cynical attitude towards world in general. However it appears to be on surface of my paintings, I think I try to say that and state it as clearly as I can.