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Both parts of my life were interesting.  It seemed to me that, as part of his work, Pat should entertain more than he had been doing, or could do in his two-room apartment.  He agreed -- in principle.  The fact of the matter was that he disliked entertaining and he was bored by cocktail and dinner party small talk.  I was surprised to find in him a streak of shyness.  He felt uncomfortable in social gatherings unless he knew most of the other guests.  Nobody would have guessed this but it was true.  I on the other hand am very gregarious.  For a time, it appeared that we had a problem.  but over the years he changed and I flatter myself that I had something to do with the change.  In his office one day I saw him throw away a large, formal-looking envelope.  I asked him about it and he said it was an invitation to a party at one of the small embassies.  "They come in bales," he said,