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but I was thinking a lot about it and for a long time and I don't see why you shouldn't know what I think. I'm sure I'd be able to and happy to take good care of you. Please Heddins, think seriously, I don't feel taking no for an answer, I made already so much thinking about it that I can't stop it. I want to be clear and open and gay tonight, I made you a childish drawing with a formal declaration of love and now I'm glad, reading what I wrote, that I said it to you and I say it again that I want you to be my wife and have a home together. There's though in my heart a shade, I'm trying to convince myself that tomorrow I'll have mail from you but what if not. For such a long time I didn't have news from you, I'm sad.