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Febr. 10 944
Dearest, I love you and I love you - 
I'm in the mood to write you I'm all covered and filled with love for you today and it's getting worst, I feel already a knot in my throat and a weight on my chest and I'd like to write you nonsense but I'm miserable, I trained myself too much on being in a way artificial that even the nonsense ought to be logical and prepared - I lost my spontaneity (or how the hell is spelled) about 15 years ago or maybe before that - I feel now like telling you everything about me, you are a good listener especially at night, I like to think of the best moments I had with you, holding some part of you a hand or arm, at night, and tell you all I know, you are a good listener at night and you are the only one to whom I talk free. I'm going to take you for one week when I'll be back home and see only you and stay to -