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5

To think that I, in making a friend of you, only gave you the power to harm me and nothing else - it is horrible and unthinkable - because I know that what is in you is only good and fine and strong. Yet you have harmed me, and I must resist that, in order to do what I have to do in my life. There is the truth, that I look for and I will make my work perfect not destroy it, for that would be cowardice and against my nature, and false. It is only doing the same work without the joy, and inspiration of hope - but by the sheer passion of the thing to be done with all my truth and power, whatever I am suffering!
And you? - Ah, my little girl, my little white Nora, - all the despair and resistance falls when I think of you - apart from myself.
That is how it may have to be, apart from myself [[illegible]]