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38 

Sunday Mar. 2. 1879. Went to the Century early last night with Calvert. We were the first ones there and had a look at the pictures before anyone came. My picture looked well. Colman took the pains to tell me he liked it very much and thought it one of my finest pictures. Several spoke to me about it and I think it was liked. But the evening was very sad to me. I feel strange and full of sorrowful thoughts. Weir and I sat together until after midnight when I came to my rooms despondent and unhappy. I thought of Gertrude and Taylor whose poor dead body was approaching our shores so in contrast to his departure less than a year ago. This morning Calvert and I after breakfast went up to the Park to see the skaters and I came home after a little overwhelmed with a sense of loneliness and sorrow. I wrote to Mrs. Sawyer and to Sade just as I felt and I am afraid she will feel sad enough when she gets my letter. The bitter grief has weighed me down all day until I went up to Booths to dinner when I felt better. Mrs. B. Edwina, Booth and I dined alone and I succeeded in getting away from myself. I staid to tea. Mrs. McVicker came in and after tea I went to see Mrs. Platt. She was very tender and kind as she always is and I talked with her of Gertrude more easily than I feared I could. Mr. Goodwin was there. I feel better this evening but it has been in many respects a trying day to me. Have written to Carrell, Potter and Salpin who are to send me the magazine of art free, to J. C. Bates about his frame &c., and so this day is ended.

Monday 3. Have been painting all day experimenting on the head of Gertrude but do not make it any better. Weir and his brother called and Mrs. Wheeler came and made me a nice call. I showed her the little head of Carrie which she like very much and I mean to give it to her. She invited me to dine at the Thurbers tomorrow. I dined with Fred & Annie Norton this evening. Julia was there and I enjoyed it very much. From there I went to the Council. I was urged for the hanging committee but I declined on the ground