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Thursday January 13 1881. Had many errands to do and was on the go forever. Sent my picture to the Union League which I have sold to them for $750. Mrs. Cross came to see me in the depths of despair again. I gave her a dollar which was all I could do for her. Had a letter from Bates saying he would like a copy of the picture he saw here, for $200 12 x 14 so I drew it in today ready to paint. Prepared a canvas for my academy picture and got my picture from Mr. De Forest from which I am to paint it. This evening Julia Vaux, Miss Mendelson, a Miss Hallowell and Miss   with Bayer, Downing and Walter Mendelson came over and spent the evening at my studio. I gave them some chocolate and some water ice and they looked over my sketches and seemed to have enjoyed themselves. Wrote to Mr. Bachelder whose card I found on my door yesterday when I came from home. Wrote a note to my mother

Friday 14. This has been a rainy, depressing day and I have had a most depressing experience. Eastman came down to tell me my picture was the cause of great trouble at the Union League club and I found that neither he nor Henry nor Waller liked it fully and so I wrote a note to Waller that in order to relieve them from all responsibility I declined to sell it to the club and he could send it back to me.  I need the money very much but I saw it would be a great injury to me to insist on the contract. It has relieved Eastman who I saw was in great trouble and had great sympathy for me.  The incident has made me feel very unhappy, but I have been in a measure prepared for it. The most discouraging thing about it is the hostility developed at the Union League club towards the American artists. The artists of the art committee were turned out last night at the election and such men as Avery put on which is most significant. It is impossible to predict where this feeling is going to land us.  It discourages me. I am going home tomorrow and I wish I could stay there.

Saturday 15. Downing and I went to Rondout by the 11 o'clk train. It was very cold  We met Platt & Miller there on their way to Rhinebeck and Platt and I sat together. Maurice met us at the station and we drove over on the ice.  The snow is deep and it is genuine winter up there.

Sunday 16  The mercury was below zero last night.  Downing and I went over to the cemetery after breakfast as I wanted to pay [[Post?]] a small bill I owed him. The snow is very deep and the walking very difficult as there is a curl which breaks through. We went around to dear Gertrudes grave. The snow lay white and deep above her, and as I stood there