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lichens and stains from the three marble head stones. They whose resting places they mark died so long ago that they scarcely seem a part of our family, at least not at all as do Maurice, my father and Mother and Gertrude. It is saddening to go there as Julia Dillon who was here last night remarked, but I do not want the place to look neglected during my life time, remembering how tenderly dear Gertrude would have tended my last resting place and how sensitive my Mother was to any neglect in this respect. I came home and read in Madame D'Arblays diary. The weather is cool and the sunshine watery and a melancholy sentiment has hung about the day. I reproach myself with not accomplishing any thing while I know the years are flying by. I wish I could absorb myself in a picture but I have not ideas for one  

Sunday May 26" 1889. A gloomy and depressing day. It rained in the night and has been brooding and cold all day. I have sat by a good fire in the sitting room all day alternately reading the Tribune, Madame D Arblays diary and writing letters. I wrote to Mary, to Ward and to Charlie McEntee. I have come to that part of Miss Birneys diary where she goes as maid of honor to Queen Charlotte and I seem to share her depression. What a position for so noble a woman, compelled to a life of a mere machine or puppet. Sara is writing in her room, the servants are gone out and the house seems lonely and sad. I long for I know not what. I think as Burroughs says it must be "my youth, my father and mother, my friends." I have written to Miss Nesmith and I found Halls letter which I received shortly after my return, and answered it, which I meant to have done before.

Monday 27" Still cold and gloomy and rain all afternoon. I went down town after breakfast on the daily errands. When I came back I fixed the chopping knife and put a pane of glass in one of the hall windows. A letter came from Lucy with a postal order to pay for Jamies shoes and one from Mary telling us that Sedgwick had received the second prize in his room at Mr. Morses School for punctuality, attendance and conduct. I am greatly pleased and have written him a congratulatory note. Last night I slept under four thicknesses of blanket and awoke with a chill. The geraniums and the arbutus we set out in the vases look as though they had been touched with frost. We have had a good fire all day.

Tuesday 28" The weather has at last cleared but it is still cold so that we keep up the fire in the sitting room. I had a letter from Wood in which he does not even refer to my visiting him up here. He refers to the sudden death of Gilbert Gauls wife as though I must know all about it but I have heard nothing of it and am anxious to know what is the "Catastrophe" to which he refers. I also had a letter from Mrs. Van Glumer who signs herself G. H. Bartlett. I am wondering if she has got a divorce from her husband. She is about selling her house in Tacubaya and having some land in the state of Durango she with her Attorney are to plant Cotton and Sugar Cane. I am worried over the future as I have been worrying all my life. I have tried to paint a little today but I seem to have lost what little skill I ever had. I talked with Henry Abbey this morning. He is discontented that he has to stick in the store on the dock when when he would like to read and study. Speaking about selling our place he seemed to think it difficult to sell real estate in this place. Whenever I talk with any one about it I get very disheartened and discouraged. We went down to John McEntees this evening. Julia was there but not John. While we were there a daughter of William Tremper and her husband called. William Tremper has just died at Malden. He was a brother of Harry, Austins & McGreger. Julia took them into the dining room and we could not help overhearing the conversation which seemed very innocent and frank on the part of the daughter. She explained to Julia that she did not go up to see their father on a certain day because