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[[strikethrough]] FRIDAY, OCTOBER 30, 1936 [[/strikethrough]]
304th Day     62 Days to come
Aug 8th & 9th

The night of the 6th, when I last wrote in here, my fever went up to 103 & 3/4 degrees! I became so quickly & so thoroughly sick that Dr Horsefield came & brought a night nurse who worked all night over me. Apparently they [[strikethrough]] were afraid it was going [[/strikethrough]] thought it might be bronchial pneumonia, but [[strikethrough]] they [[/strikethrough]] it is only bad bronchitis [[strikethrough]] instead [[/strikethrough]], because the next a.m. my fever was down to 101. I felt like Helen of Troy being fought over inside myself instead of outside - it was as quick & violent as a tornado - & has left me weak & empty with [[strikethrough]] back ache & [[/strikethrough]] such back & head & chest acheage as I've rarely felt. I was most interested in all reasons & symptoms & cures - & nice Dr Horsefield, & nice Miss Thompson have faithfully answered all my questions. For what is the use in being sick, except as another experience (which I can gayly say as I am so rarely sick) - & a [[strikethrough]] reminder of [[/strikethrough]] moral reminder of how [[strikethrough]] much [[/strikethrough]] other people feel when they are sick, & an irritating reminder


[[strikethrough]] SATURDAY, OCTOBER 31, 1936 [[/strikethrough]]
305th Day Reformation Day - Hallowe'en  61 Days to come

[[strikethrough]]next stage to abstract. is more abstract [[/strikethrough]] [[strikethrough]] Mrs Hopk. Whisle. Helen of Troy [[/strikethrough]]
[[strikethrough]]Reading Antony - reticent - squizoid all romance girls [[/strikethrough]]
cont.

of how indispensible coffee & cigarettes & [[strikethrough]] the general [[/strikethrough]] daily joy of living become - & how [[strikethrough]] despite that they can be [[/strikethrough]] easily they can be lived-without. Mrs Hopkins has been very kind & thoughtful, & I think enjoyed [[strikethrough]] the have the [[/strikethrough]] indulging in her annoyance about the whole thing - so I am not sorry for anyone but the poor nurse, who "has a gasoline complex, because she has always craved affection in vain." Mrs Hopkins still has to keep out the false teeth on her lower jaw - because the abscess is not quite gone - so she whistles [[strikethrough]] all day in order & [[/strikethrough]] all through & in between [[strikethrough]] every all [[/strikethrough]] & during every word all & every day - in order to fill the gap which would otherwise be occupied by embarassment. I can't understand her coldness - because really she is very warm - but I guess her emotions [[strikethrough]] are [[/strikethrough]] were so exhausted by Whit's death that she simply won't allow that side of her to exist now, & she refuses to get fond of anyone because fondness is bound to hurt at times. The result