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[[strikethrough]] WEDNESDAY, NOVEMBER 11, 1936 [[/strikethrough]]
316th Day  Armistice Day 50 Days to come
cont.

which used to scare the nurse into thinking I was choking to death with my cough. [[strikethrough]] It looks as if One might think I have a weakness for vagabonds when [[/strikethrough]] It looks as if I have a weakness [[strikethrough]] of [[/strikethrough]] for vagabond [[strikethrough]] these days pulling closest men friends [/strikethrough]] lovers these days - for Kenneth is at the Olympics in Berlin, Jay is in Mexico, Kim in Hawaii (or was until yesterday), St J in Boston, Henry in Essex etc - & just when I should like some callers. Kenneth is coaching the Eng. crew & I [[strikethrough]] ra [[/strikethrough]] wrack my eyes in the paper & ears over the radio for news of him. Kim is just back - & dining here tomorrow night. Dickie Delano has turned up & I hope to see him [[strikethrough]] I will certain [[/strikethrough]] I love him - & will certainly be one of his most frequent visitors in the Insane Asylum he will end up in. My [[strikethrough]] moods are so reversed now [[/strikethrough]] Routine of mind & body is completely reversed now. I used to awake late & tired, & retire late & inspired - so that the day was a crescendo from piano to forte -

[[strikethrough]] THURSDAY, NOVEMBER 12, 1936 [[/strikethrough]]
317th Day  49 Days to come
cont.

& now I awake [[strikethrough]] at [[/strikethrough]] before 8 with my crescendo at forte - & retire at midnight - which is hard because it never quite [[strikethrough]] runs itself [[/strikethrough]] points itself into a real piano until I have tossed & coughed for some time in the dark. Oh well - crescendos of piano & forte are [[strikethrough]] nicer [[/strikethrough]] safer than those of joys & tears. Mumsie is such a lovely & discriminating comfort - she listens by the hour & without uttering a word makes one think twice about everything. She is always torn between being the perfect mother & the perfect  wife - for Paul & I [[strikethrough]] pref [[/strikethrough]] prevent the two from being performed at the same moment because she must be either everything to him, or everything to me, which is only possible separately. When P & I are together with her she favors the perfect wife side - & there is where the trouble began 6 years ago. I have learned all about it now though, & through being an excellent actress - all goes smoothly. 

My puppet [[strikethrough]] won't  be [[/strikethrough]] - my poppen jay - my penny puppet poppin jay from 
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